Last night I learned how shock can move you to feel in a specific location of your body. Seeing Ben get hurt, and uselessly imagining how much worse it could have been... rage, love and despair rushed together into a dark rectangular shape that pressed down behind my rib cage. It's heavy like slate but glides and hovers like smoke or mercury.

But to experience this also revealed a co-existing deep love and empathy, plus an opportunity to witness more examples of forgiveness and grace from the bravest man I know.